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FETUS EATERS/BRAINCHOKE
VOMITCORE/MICROCHIPPED AND MINDCONTROLLED (SPLIT RELEASE)
GRINDETHIC, 2004
FETUS EATERS: 5 OUT OF 5 \ BRAINCHOKE: 3.5 OUT OF 5
SUMMARY | FETUS EATERS CARRIES BRAINCHOKE TO A RESPECTABLE MATCH...I MEAN, I'D BUY IT
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Goddamn I'm reliable, aren't I? �For the past two years I've had periods where I've updated like mad followed by months of stagnation like...oh, I don't know, THE PERIOD BETWEEN JUNE 2004 AND NOW. �I apologize to Grindethic (and everyone I've contacted recently, to be honest) for my incredible tardiness, but I'll let you people in on a secret.
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I really hate doing this site.
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Sure, I've been promising this and that for ages now, but I really have hated doing this website for a year or two. �The upkeep is irritating and the scene points I get for doing this are nil, really. �I know I'm supposed to type about how great the metal scene is followed by a few "HAIL METALS" or two, but I've branched out into other interests, contacted myriad companies, and basically dithered around for some time. �I'm doing this while working for my father, who is as easy to put up with sometimes as passing an entire orange through one's rectum. �This may sound like a giant excuse to you people, but to the ones who know the underground best, welcome to it. �I have never been paid (in real money, anyway) to write an article and this is my one poorly-handled labour of love. �I hate myself for still doing UR.
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Isn't this a great way to start a review? �I'm such a happy man, aren't I?
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Anyway, unless you've been living under a rock for the past five years (and I'm not discounting the theory that some of you are trolls) Fetus Eaters' Vomitcore is one of the most well-liked grindcore releases of the past five years. �The band are pure "joke grindcore" and that just isn't a favourite of the crowd that hates what it calls "fun metal," but one listen to this and you'll understand why Fetus Eaters are held in such high regard. �This album is legible as grindcore due to what someone has termed the "Jap screams" of the lead singer, and pretty much the entire album is composed of short ninety-second ditties that do what they were meant to do: be annoying and offensively humourous. �Seriously, one cannot take titles like "The Carpet Don't Match the Drapes" and "T.T.T.Tom" seriously, and it's to the band's credit that their music is at least as good as the humour on tap here. �The band could have easily become an A.C. ripoff or fallen into Lawnmower Deth levels of mediocrity (admit it, Lawnmower Deth fans - they are not that great), but this band is like my brain (by which I mean it's bizarre.) �They're serious musicians taking the piss, and they're "out there" enough that they can use elements like the Tums/Dragnet theme and shitty beatboxing and make them work, damn it. �There's a reason Vomitcore is genuinely legendary.
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As for Brainchoke, they're doing that thrashy death metal bit with the familiar-to-Voivod-fans theme of technology, and they're not bad. �Still, Microchipped and Mindcontrolled is hurt by being the weaker part of a Grindethic two-for-one. �Brainchoke aren't helping matters by scraping material from different points in their (short) career as the material doesn't have an even consistency to it. �The death-metal-oriented songs have been pushed out in front while the more melodic, mainstream-oriented grindy songs have been relegated to the second half of their album. �It makes for rushed-sounding aesthetics and doesn't really show Brainchoke at their best. �They have talent, but attaching a debut album to a rerelease of a deserved cult favourite maybe wasn't the best way to introduce Brainchoke. �Still, there's promise in this band. �I'm sure they'll be able to carry their own end of things in the future, but not at this stage of their career. �Give 'em another two years.
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By the way, this release is sold out (no shit?) right now, and I'm sure Grindethic Records is pissed off at me for delaying a review this long. �Then again, I plan to be overhauling UR in the near future so expect a lot more reviews from me soon. �Also, expect the man who runs Grindethic to give me a boot in the ass. �Still, if it wasn't for the label I may never have written for Unrestrained!, so figure that shit out. �I bet you can't.
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GRINDETHIC RECORDS
PO Box 244
Anlaby
Hull
HU106WX
ENGLAND (UK)
http://www.grindethic.co.uk/
[email protected]
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FETUS EATERS: PO Box 6488 / Burbank, CA (USA) / 91510-6488 | [email protected] | http://www.fetuseaters.com/
BRAINCHOKE: http://www.brainchoke.com/
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